Dreams

What exactly is my dream?
What is it that I really want in my life?
What is that that I cannot live without in my life?
What is it that without, I would rather die?

These are the four questions I asked myself. Despite it all seemingly represent the same meaning, they much the less get different answers.

What exactly is my dream?
If you consider what I think about right before I sleep, where usually self-reflection of the recent days and sort occurs, I would think of how to open more GPs, how to get my friend to open GPs, and I might even think of how far I am from what I really want.
I want to be a millionaire, and it's no easy way to begin now. Even an anonymous popoku commented on my previous post about how I would go about my goal. But I want to be sure, so I do things some of my friends don't do. And even so, I'm not so sure how much it would help.
My dream is to become someone respected because I worked myself from where I am, from rag to riches.
Other things I give serious thoughts are how to become more perfect a person I am, and the small stupid habits I should change to become a better man.

What is it that I really want in my life?
How different should this answer be from my previous one? What do I want in my life? I want to be rich, to be respected and to even own big plots of land, have buildings built by my command, my names on them, I want to have a multinational Company, created by me, to stand the test of time and transcend into the next millennium. There is so much I want, there is so much to do, I have big dreams, so much so I am rather paralyzed by my own ambition. And why do I want all this in my life? I want the happiness than comes along working for these and knowing I have achieved beyond what I thought possible. I want the pride that comes along knowing I am above others. Peharps these are what I really want.

What is that that I cannot live without in my life?
I cannot life without my courage. I cannot live running day to day, hiding from my fears, they make me feel so weak that even as I am held back by the fear, I desire to rejoin and challenge that I fail to do. I cannot accept the fact that I allow myself the easy way out even as I keep doing that. I resent myself for being such the weakling I am. I know I can achieve so much for I have the mentality to go on, but I hate how my cowardice stuns me whenever I pose to take action. I cannot live with a "weak and happy to remain where he is" inner self, I get the constant push to go on, no matter how much I resist, until I regain my role of which I at first ran away from.

What is it that without, I would rather die?
Despite all the courage I have, or want to have, all the ambitions I have, if I don't have a family, girlfriend, wife, friends to be there, I would rather die. There is no point in fighting to be so rich, to have such a strong inner mentality to be so powerful and able, but be there for no one and knowing that no one needs your help. Try as I might, I will never gain my riches through unscrupulous methods, that will forsaken and relinquish the friendships and relationships of those I have. That would be self-defeating.