The Dream

I had a dream yesterday and it brought me attention to something. Although I remembered that it felt really intense at that time, and now it feels absolutely normal, I still wish to say something about it.

In the dream, I was in a dangerous position, and would be about to die. As I was about to die, I thought of all the things I wouldn't be able to do, haven't acomplished and how life would just suck if I just die like that having achieved nothing worth commenting about. And yes, I did die.

In the dream, the death wasn't painful even as it involved me getting involved in a falling building and being crushed to death. I remember trying my best to cling for my life for I wanted to survive. I thought I made it and when I next saw the papers, I was one of the casualty. I remember being how sad to die.

At that point of time, I wondered. If I knew I was going to die, would I ignore every constraint I have and just go forward to achieve what I wanted to? Would I care about failures? Amusingly, the pain of death wasn't death itself for me then. It was the inability to achieve the achievement goals I have set for myself.

I remember how hard I weeped and how strong my emotions. I recall my pain and I vowed to do all I can when I get a chance to be alive again, which I never did. I got my chance already when I awoke from my dream only to find out that, I never really took and gratefully accept the second chance. I still am doing what I am doing without much headway and hardly motivated to do something big now.

I recall how painful it was to see my family members being depressed for me, and even as I saw them, they couldn't see me. I felt depressed beyond words.

Dreams are so powerful and the emotion stirred me from the sleep way too many times. But as when I finally awoke, things resume their course and I set about doing the things I do before with no change with no difference in direction. The dream was great but wasted.